Questions

A few big answers come and load the questions under their weight, even those which haven't yet been asked. Even when questions are more interesting than answers. An answer is like a sleeping giant. I can't gather the courage to disturb it out of its sleep and so I let it sleep for ages in its stagnant finality. A question, on the other hand, you can hold its hand as if it were a child, and run around with it as it runs around in unknown joys, and stand still when it stands still in the awe of having made yet another little discovery about the world with its own innocent intelligence.

So, I just let the questions float around me. The collection of a lot of questions, however, leaves me uneasy. It tells me another big fact, that I am growing up. Growing up involves a lot of load-carrying. You are carrying it all for the future, and since you don't know the future, you don't know how much of it you'll really need and how much it you'd better get rid of.

Growing up ain't good. Most of my answers are answers of resignation. I've started to believe life is made of small things, and it's just because big things aren't happening, or I am unable to bring them to happen. I've started to believe that right and wrong are hazy concepts, and that's because I never seem to be able to decide what is right and what is wrong. Maybe all this is right, but I got to admit that I believe in them even without seeing much. Because I don't want to live with just questions, I've picked up answers randomly.

Just want to be able to live with unanswered questions. It's irritating not be a child anymore, and not being an adult yet either. Worst part is, this is probably the most interesting period of my life.